5.27.2009

Sometimes you find yourself on an island. Sometimes survival requires you to devolve to your deepest instincts.



Even with nothing but a canoe, a blue speedo, an oar, some matches and a couple homies, shred city can be achieved. Take note.  
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5.26.2009

Skateable Habitats

"The architect wanted the ‘skateboarding’ element to be more than simply putting a mini ramp in the living room. Rather, the ramp, the bowl and all the interpretations of those terms would actually become the building elements for this space. It is intended to be a ‘ramp house’ and not a ‘house with a ramp’. Straight lines are curved and the flat surface becomes a ramp or a bowl. Basic house elements such as the fireplace and storage units are hidden inside the ramp forms"

The Ramp House

In the same vein, we have the Bastard Skateboards Shop/HQ in Milan
Business on the bottom

Party on the top


.
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5.22.2009

This will make your heart explode.



Over 13 red bulls worth of caffeine in 2 ounces. Literally pure liquid caffeine. It's only a matter of time before some young entrepreneur discovers this and makes a killing selling vials of this on the playground during 6th grade recess. Or before I start doing that.


**UPDATE-


Never one to be outdone, Red Bull Cola was found to contain trace amounts of cocaine. BEST PUBLICITY EVER. Your move purecaf. Coming soon, "Red Bull Energy Nose Powder"
Too strung out from snorting lines of dried up redbull cola to shut your jittery bloodshot energy eyes? Introducing "Drank:The Anti Energy Drink."
Slow your roll indeed.

*EDIT-"Health Canada issued a warning about Hardcore Energize Bullet liquid energy drink... The reason for the recall was because one vial was found to have been subject to tampering, Health Canada said...A utility knife blade was found in one vial of each product, the FDA said."
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Tattoo you

Think you're hangin' tough with your knuckle/neck tat combo? Its time to step it up chump.




More pics Here

Or, if you a bitch, you could fake it and run some of these bad boys. Check out the mirrored lenses. I'm calling it, once kanye cops these shits, them are the new shutter shades.

While on the subject of contact lenses, allow me to direct your attention to this exploration of the future of contact lenses, courtesy of the always top notch butteryass mondays.

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5.20.2009

Partytime.

How to party:

Go to a hardware store. Ask for a paint stick. Buy or steal it. Then put beer in it and do this.


Now say you find yourself somewhere (a wedding possibly, a funeral, your bar mitzvah, job interview, etc) that is not a conducive or appropriate environment to say, be slamming beers into your face using a piece of industrial equipment. You should get the fuck out of there and go somewhere else and slam beers into your face using a piece of industrial equipment. However, if this is not possible, some discretion is necessary. That is where your new friend "The Beer Belly" comes in handy.

Essentially a fannypack with a drinking problem. Or, if you find yourself to be of the female persuasion, may I suggest the "Wine Rack"

Or, you could do the trusty "Mcdonald's Cup Method." Now the way this works is as follows.

Step 1. Get a large McDonald cup, a lid, and a straw.
Step 2. Insert and open canned beverage of choice
Step 3. Apply Lid and insert straw through both lid, and mouth of can. Suddenly, you are just drinking a soda. When beverage is empty, remove can and reinsert freshie can, lid and straw. Swap that clip son.

*EDIT- More good strategies and devices for covert boozing HERE
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Skateboarding needs more obstacle courses.

-Have you ever seen that show with the ridiculous obstacle course? Ninja Challenge or something rad like that? This is that but on skateboards.
Reminds me of this epicly later'd with Haslem. He builds an awesome obstacle course/track thing that winds all around the cheese and crackers warehouse.



Go Skate.
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Thrashin Thursdays skate quicklinks

Skate Quick Links

-Old news but big brother magazine is coming back. It's about time.

-Dude gets drunk. Decides to carve THRASHER into his hand. Forgets the R. And once you have THASHER sliced into you, what option do you have but to take a belt sander to it?Breakdown and a picture of the aftermath

-Awesome collection of the most useless, clueless shitgimmickry ever invented to cash in on this hot new trend sweeping the nation!-thanks to Skateboardingsucks.com

-The Berrics-This website rules. Obviously.

-Fuck tha po-lice man. Get a Max Skate Bike



-in case anyone hasn't seen this yet-

Shaka bro
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5.19.2009

Obscure Synchronicity, as it relates to T-shirts, Gummo and Skateboarding

Synchronicity is the experience of two or more events which are causally unrelated occurring together in a supposedly meaningful manner."
-Wikipedia


So a few days ago, I decided to watch one of the greatest pieces of visual art ever put to vhs for the 90325th time. The film I am referring to, of course is as follows-




Now, if you have never seen this film, do it as soon as possible. It will change your life and touch you in inappropriate places. I'll wait. Now, it was this scene in particular that gave me the HOLY SHIT the universe is one giant organism and the universe is interconnected and hippie shit blah blah blah etc moment.




Now I was watching this and had my first of two revelations. The Red Sweatpants Avenger who taps in about halfway through to lay the smack down on the chair looked vaguely familiar, and I realized he looked a heck of a lot like OG skateboard legend Mark Gonzales. I checked the credits and it turns out it is. Then my second revelation came. I noticed that the gay black midget in the background was wearing a shirt with an Israeli flag. Identical to the shirt that Gonzales wore for about 5 seconds in his part in video days. I don't give a fuck who you are or where you come from, you need this video part in your life right now. Watch it. Easily one of the top 5 best video parts of all time. In one of the top 5 videos of all time. This is the cream of the crop ladies and gentleman. Timeless.

pure poetry.

Back to the point:
FACT:
IT IS THE SAME FUCKING SHIRT. Gonz must have given it to the dude during filming.



Why do I get so stoked on shit that probably only makes sense to me? Counterpoint, have you ever been so jealous of a gay black midget? discuss
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5.17.2009

Slo Mo to the MAXXX

Who would have thought that all it takes to make pipe fun to watch is to make it way slower? 1000fps.

Hispeed camera snowboard contest from David Coiffier on Vimeo.


The potential this technology carries is staggering. Here is another example of people utilizing this beautiful machine to its fullest potential-
A bunch more slo mo madness here- here

How has no one used this for porn yet? In other snowboard video technology breakthroughs/gimmickry the first 3d snowboard movie in history is coming out courtesy of futuristic scanners Factor Films and lookin mighty sweet.

3D pre-teaser for Factor Films' "They Came From..." from snowbroader.eu on Vimeo.



In case anyone forgot their 3d glasses, here is an alternate 2D (Aka "soon to be old school") teaser. The casting looks excellent.

Factor Films teaser "They Came From..." from snowbroader.eu on Vimeo.

Thanks to high quality euro shred blog http://broblog.snowbroader.eu/ for the heads up on this development.

Speaking of gimmickry/retrofuturism, I present to you a snowboard deck that was sent back from the year A693L-D to destroy the reputation of anyone caught paying almost $2000 for one. Meet "The Whip"

PS.Goddamn it, I actually really want to ride that thing. This weird fucker not so much-



So lets say you took the your sweet sweet codaboard out for some hotlaps, trying to pick up some futurebabez and you happened catch an edge on a turbo double daffy twister spread 9000 and happened to break your neck and became paralyzed from the waist down. Would you really want to get back on board by bombing around the mountain superman style, head first with no real way to stop short of combining your face and a tree? If you answered yes, have I got an invention for you





surfs up doodz.

But I digress. Back to the subject at hand, novelty filmmaking technologies. I love em. Lets speak a moment on the topic of 3d movies. I am all for the comeback 3d is making in mainstream cinema. Don't let jonas brothers 3d taint your opinion of what could be a revolution in passive entertainment. Tim Burton is all over this shit and has like 3 3d movies coming out including a live action remake of alice in wonderland with Johnny Depp as the mad hatter and Helena Bonham Carter as the red queen. Pass the large mushroom.

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Pogo A Go-Go

And the award for least sympathy deserved goes to...

I'm not gonna to lie, Although he may be borderline retarded, I want to party with that dude.
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LETS GET RAD

Fuck the internet, I think this is the greatest accomplishment of our time. And it was in Vermont. Obviously.


This man is an inspiration. Not enough people in the world follow through with pursuing the things they drew in textbooks during middle school algebra.
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